Sometimes I get in those moods where I am filled with sadness and loneliness. I know everyone gets there at times, but it seems like since joining the military spouse ranks it happens more often. I know a lot of it is that I am so far away from friends and family and while they are all supportive its all from a distance. Don't get me wrong my husband is amazing and very supportive, loving and wonderful, I have no real complaints there.
We moved to a new base in the last year, we thought this was going to be great, he had friends here. Sadly us wives just could not seem to get along. I honestly am not sure what went wrong or why, I know what both men have told me but recently I am coming to believe that at least one of the men in this group wanted this to fail, and wanted it be be the wives fault. I still can't figure out why he was telling everyone things that would make things awkward and uncomfortable but I have given up trying to understand it. I hate it for my husband, and I really hate it for my self and the other wife, we are being blamed for things that don't make sense. I think we could have gotten along with out someone setting it up to fail. Had we been allowed to meet and get to know each other, we seem to have a lot in common.
I wonder sometimes if this is the same type of things that other military spouses go through with FRG's and support organizations. I was a part of a couple support pages on Facebook but I found them to be more harmful than helpful, which really leaves me out on my own. I want to have friends here, people to go shopping with, I love my husband but really he's not much fun to shop with. People to have coffee with, or just have an adult conversation with! The internet is a wonderful tool but it is no replacement for human interaction!
Sometimes I just want to talk to other people who understand and are not so busy looking to judge others based on what they have, don't have, look like, political ideas, religious backgrounds. I really like to think I am pretty easy to get along with, I miss my friends back home. I miss the friends I made at our last duty station. I hope we are able to make some here soon. I think the loneliness and sadness is hard on any relationship and I think its worse in a military relationship because it add an extra layer of stress and distance that not everyone has to deal with.
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